The Most Expensive Coffee Beans In The World… And They Kind of Stink: Black Ivory Coffee

Are you ready to take your coffee game to the next level? Well, buckle up buttercup because we’re about to talk about the crème de la crème of coffee beans: Black Ivory coffee.

Unlike your regular cup of Joe, Black Ivory coffee isn’t harvested from the usual regular plain Jane coffee plant. Oh no, no, no. These beans are collected from the dung of elephants. That’s right, you heard me correctly – elephant dung. These elephants chow down on the coffee cherries, their bodies do their magic, and voila! Out come the s#*t beans, ready to be cleaned and roasted for the rich to “enjoy”.

Here’s the thing, this process ain’t no walk in the park. It’s labor-intensive, and the supply of Black Ivory coffee beans is as rare as it is to get your hands on a PS5. So, it’s no surprise that a pound of these bad boys can fetch anywhere around $1000. That’s like buying a new espresso machine, just for the small bag of poopy coffee beans! But, hey, when you’re living your best coffee life, the price is worth it.

The real question is, how does it taste? Some people say it’s nutty and earthy, with a smooth finish. But, let’s be real, it’s also got a distinct, musky aftertaste that might not be for everyone… maybe just maybe, it’s because it’s from literal elephant poop. It’s like Marmite, you either love it or hate it.

Although, before you go running off to buy a pound of Black Ivory coffee, let’s talk about the elephant in the room (pun intended). There are some ethical concerns related to the treatment of elephants in the production of Black Ivory coffee. But don’t worry, there are some great organizations that support sustainable and ethical coffee production with elephants.

So, if you’re keen to try Black Ivory coffee but want to make sure it’s produced in a humane and environmentally-friendly way, look for beans that are certified by organizations like Golden Triangle Asian Elephant Foundation. This foundation seeks to help captive elephants by enhancing their welfare and lifestyles while simultaneously participating in wild elephant conservation projects to preserve the survival of the wild herd. That way you know the elephants producing these stinky poop-uccino beans are living their best lives roaming around in a large fenced-in area and are treated well.

In conclusion, Black Ivory coffee is the ultimate luxurious and unique coffee experience, but it comes with a high price tag. If you’re willing to splurge and try something dis-stinkingly different, give it a taste and see if it’s your cup of tea (or coffee). But remember, there are also many other types of coffee out there to explore that aren’t quite as shitty for your bank account, so don’t be afraid to branch out and try something new!